I am drunk. I ate sardines on toast, half an avocado and some chocolate which I really regret. I have been squeezing my face which I also really regret.
I had a good talk with my mum yesterday which resolved all my troubles but which has now faded into the ether/ethanol.
Speech went well and got lots of good feedback. Tutors have plans for me and think I’m great and passionate and blah.
Walked home in rain with L and J’s paper Primark bags which utterly collapsed. Was nearly drunk enough to forget the bus journey.
Want a boyfriend. Want to be drunk enough to ignore everything. Drinking is vey bad for me. Blehhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Went to sleep at about 3am, got up at 9.20. Started having hypnagogic hallucinations which were a bit distressing, especially when I could hear myself laughing through my dreams.
Wish I could live outside of my personal life. Like if I could live entirely as the cool and capable, if sweet and blushing, professional I can be.